Brown word or get off the Potter

The new Harry Potter book (something about a blood sausage or something) is due out today at midnight.
I’ve never read one of these books.
I never intend to read one.
I won’t ever go to see the movie.
I just don’t care.
I don’t understand the whole deal about witchcraft and sorcery, etc.
Pay attention now, church lady, IT’S FICTION!! I don’t care if it teaches kids how to summon Lucifer or make the neighbor’s goat give sour milk, for all I care they can trade thier souls for a new X-box. Go for it, God bless, have fun.
I figure if it gets some this nation’s illiterate little bastards reading, more power to ya.